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Appearances by Television Celebrities!
Dawn Wells (Wednesday, July 11 in Myrtle Beach)
Butch Patrick (Friday, July 13 in Altoona; Saturday, July 14 in State College)
Christopher Knight (Tuesday, July 17 in Altoona)
The Altoona Curve, Myrtle Beach Pelicans and State College Spikes are all part of the same ownership group, and therefore have similar promotional schedules. Most notably, each club takes part in the "Retro Celebrity Series," in which television stars of decades past visit ballparks in order to pose for pictures and sign autographs. This week is a particularly active one for the series. Dawn Wells, better known as Mary Ann from "Gilligan's Island," visits Myrtle Beach on Wednesday. Butch "Eddie Munster" Patrick then makes a Friday the 13th appearance in Altoona before heading over to State College for a "Halloween in July" promotion on Saturday. Finally, Christopher Knight (aka Peter Brady) will grace the Curve faithful with his presence on Tuesday.

Frederick Keys (Carolina League)
Salute to the High Five
Wednesday, July 11 vs. Lynchburg Hillcats
The high-five has long been our country's celebratory gesture of choice, an act of congratulations so ubiquitous that we rarely stop to consider its greatness. The Keys, ever-mindful of the little things that make life worth living, will be doing just that during Wednesday's "Salute to the High Five." The first 200 fans will receive a complimentary hand clapper, and cinematic tributes to the high-five will take place throughout the evening. And, in what is sure to be an expert display of hand-to-hand non-combat, team employees will compete in a High Five Staff Showdown. Finally, any fan craving a high five of his or her own can visit the Guaranteed High Five table, where slaps will be distributed free of charge all night long.

Lowell Spinners (New York-Penn League)
Sweatband Wristwatch Giveaway
Thursday, July 12 vs. Batavia Muckdogs
In a brilliant "you got chocolate in my peanut butter" sort of moment, the Spinners have combined two previously separate items into a cohesive whole. On Thursday, the club will be distributing sweatband wristwatches to the first 1,500 kids in attendance. These items are exactly what the name implies: a digital watch imbedded in a sporty blue wristband. Finally, America's children can find out what time it is while simultaneously wiping the sweat from the brow. The future is now.

Billings Mustangs (Pioneer League)
Construction Helmet Night (Friday, July 13 vs. Orem Owlz)
Cobb Field Replica Night (Saturday, July 14 vs. Ogden Raptors)
The Mustangs will celebrate the future on Friday and the past on Saturday, all while striving to remain rooted in the eternal, unchanging present. First, it's "Construction Helmet Night," during which the club will hand over 1,000 souvenir helmets. This unique giveaway serves as a celebration of the fact that Billings is in the midst of building a new stadium to replace Cobb Field, which is currently in its 59th (and last) season as the home of the Mustangs. Those currently mourning the imminent demise of the beloved ballpark should make sure to attend Saturday's game, as 1,000 miniature bronze Cobb Field replicas will be given away. Sunrise, sunset. Sunrise, sunset.

Boise Hawks (Northwest League)
Reverse the Curse Night
Friday, July 13 vs. Yakima Bears
On Friday the 13th, the Hawks are staging their third annual "Reverse the Curse Night," during which they do everything in their power to change the horrible luck of the Chicago Cubs, their parent club. The Cubs have been "cursed" since Game 4 of the 1945 World Series, when tavern owner Billy Sianis and his pet goat were ejected from Wrigley Field (allegedly because of the goat's objectionable odor). Sianis was outraged by this lack of respect, and put a curse on the Cubs that continues to this day. The Hawks, looking to make amends for this long-ago mishap, promise to admit all goats into the ballpark, free of charge. Additionally, Cubs replica caps will be given away to the first 1,250 humans in attendance.

West Michigan Whitecaps (Midwest League)
Gerald Ford Museum Baseball Giveaway
Friday, July 13 vs. Beloit Snappers
Former President Gerald Ford passed away on December 26 of last year, and his final resting place is at his Presidential Museum in Grand Rapids, Mich. The museum is just a short drive from the Whitecaps' Fifth Third Ballpark, so let the Ford-themed promotions begin! Ford would have turned 94 years old this week, and to celebrate the occasion the Whitecaps will be giving away 1,500 Gerald Ford Museum baseballs prior to Friday's contest. Additionally, a video tribute to the former President will take place prior to the ballgame. There'll be nary a dry eye in the house.

Casper Rockies (Pioneer League)
Johnny Cash Night
Saturday, July 14 vs. Helena Brewers
Now here's a simple, cost-effective promotion whose appeal cuts across generational lines: Johnny Cash Night at Casper's Mike Lansing Field. The entire Rockies' staff will dress in black in honor of the legendary singer, and fans who do so will gain admittance to the game at half the usual cost. Additionally, all the music played throughout the evening will be Cash-related, so it goes without saying that this will be a spectacular improvement over crusty ballpark fare such as "Cotton Eye Joe" and cringe-inducing "Sweet Caroline" sing-a-longs. Let's hope this promo starts a trend throughout all of Minor League Baseball.

Hickory Crawdads (South Atlantic League)
Tie-Dye Sport Socks Giveaway
Sunday, July 15 vs. Lexington Legends
In this day and age, it's tough to come up with a truly unique giveaway item. Hasn't it all been done before? The answer is, "No, of course not." There are truly an infinite number of things that can be handed to fans as they pass through the turnstiles (Sweatband Wirstwatches, anyone?), and the Hickory Crawdads are well aware of this fact. Two months after their celebrated Beach Raft Giveaway, the Crawdads are handing out 1,000 pairs of tie-dye sport socks prior to Sunday's game against Lexington. Make sure you get to the game early, because it's likely a bunch of hippies will show up looking to score a stash of these coveted items.

Lakewood BlueClaws (South Atlantic League)
Steve Carlton Appearance
Sunday, July 15 vs. Delmarva Shorebirds
Steve Carlton won 329 games over 24 seasons, the second-most by a southpaw in all of baseball history. Willie Stargell once likened hitting his slider to "drinking coffee with a fork," but it should be considerably easier to get an autograph from the former Phillies hurler during Sunday evening's BlueClaws game. After all, that's why the 62-year-old Hall of Famer will be at the ballpark -- for the sole purpose of affixing his signature to whatever piece of memorabilia one decides to place in front of him. Take advantage of this rare opportunity to be in the presence of left-handed greatness.

Salem-Keizer Volcanoes (Northwest League)
Fiesta de Beisbol Night
Sunday, July 15 vs. Vancouver Canadians
Sunday's contest in Salem-Keizer will truly have an international flair, as it features a team from the U.S. taking on a squad from Canada while celebrating the culture of Latin America. Yes, it's "Fiesta de Beisbol Night," during which the Volcanoes will pay tribute to Spanish-speaking fans and players. Local Mexican restaurants will provide the food, baseball cards of Latin American players will be distributed, and members of the Mexican Consulate will meet and greet the fans and take charge of throwing out the first pitch. Los Gallos Mariachi is scheduled to provide pre-game musical entertainment, and a fireworks show will follow the game. The icing on the cake of this spectacular fiesta is that radio superstar DJ El Panda will entertain fans throughout the ballgame with his zany antics.

Bonus Coverage!

There are so many promotions taking place this time of year that some gems will inevitably slip through the cracks. Here's brief rundown of some promos that didn't quite make it into last week's column, but could or should have.

Bad Breath Night (Bowie, July 6): In which an intern by the name of Harrison was given the unenviable task of finding the person with the worst breath in the entire ballpark. Between-innings mini-contests included an onion-eating competiton and orange juice squeeze-off.

Mel Counts Appearance (Salem-Keizer, July 6): Mel Counts, a member of the 1964 Olympic basketball team, and the first pick of the Boston Celtics in that year's draft, graced Volcanoes Stadium with his presence.

Fisher Cats' One-Millionth Fan Celebration (New Hampshire, July 7): And they said a franchise named after a predatory, medium-sized mustelid would never last. Wrong!

Ripley's Believe It Or Not Night (Greeneville, July 10): Employees from a nearby Ripley's Believe It Or Not Museum filled Pioneer Park with all manner of oddities and curiosities.

Benjamin Hill is a contributor to MLB.com. This story was not subject to the approval of the National Association of Professional Baseball Leagues or its clubs.

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